The Privileged Balk

Last post and I'll get out of your hair...


A couple of weeks ago COMM 1010 introduced the chapter on Language, Culture, and Power and my student from hell turned another student into a student from hell. Yes, there are two now--both Fraternity members--both white. Together, they are getting worse in regards of disrupting class and becoming more and more disengaged week in and week out.

I prefaced the privilege walk as a special activity the week prior. The day of I instructed my class that we would be doing the special activity outside. I stay behind the class to make sure that the door is closed and just in case students who are late know that the class is outside today, in case they forgot. As I am the last one to leave my two students from hell try to break off from the rest of my class and run up the stairs so that they would not have to participate in today's festivities. I was young and thought I was slick as well once. Little do they know I was 10 times more hard headed and mischievous than they could ever imagine (Still am). I catch them half up the stairs and let out a loud bolt of "Na ha!! Y'all come back down here right now or I'm dropping two letter grades from your final grades!". Both come back down and claim that they "thought outside was upstairs". I reply, "and I thought Obama was the pope".

The class arrives outside and we start the activity. I explain the privilege walk to my students and after we began. While reading the questions extremely loud both of the student from hell start to engage in numerous conversations with one another (I should have split them apart) instead of listening to the questions. They were asked numerous times to stop talking, they couldn't hear hear the questions because they were over there bumpin they gums!

After we finished the activity we debriefed. This debrief expanded far beyond evaluation on whether the student's liked it or not. By engaging in CCP I got to ask question like why they liked it. As you probably would have guessed the students from hell whom were well ahead of everyone else experienced distaste for the activity. I asked them why they didn't like it and one of them responded with "I just think that it was pointless. It's not going to change anything; I will still treat everyone the same". I almost threw the chair at him, that happens to be attached to the desk. His partner and another white student shouted with joy, agreeing with him. I ask the rest of the class what they think, and the class just shook their heads in disappointment, but no words were uttered.

I'm going to honest, I did not know what made even more upset, the student from hell's stupidity or the silence that occupied the room. I counted to 10 in my head and I responded. For length purposes I will not state what I said. the point I want to make here is a tough one. My goal in the class is to disrupt whiteness by denying students rights to abject scripts. How? By holding a mini lecture and a think pair share discussing hegemony and power the day before the privilege walk. After the lecture and think pair share we as a class debrief. During the debrief we interrogate color-blindness and other techniques that reticulates systems of oppression (Another CCP component). Getting everyone involved is a strategy employed so that students hold each other and the teacher accountable and responsible for their responses. I thought their classmates would call the students from hell out, and it did not happen.

As painful as it might seem, if this is to happen I believe it is our job as educators to educate. I was prepared for students who identify as white to balk on the activities and the talk back. No, we do not want our white students to shut down, for they are an important part of your classroom community and the activity itself. But it is so important to address abject scripting and talks of colorblindness. If they shut down, it is important to let them know it's okay to feel the way that they do, but we must challenge them to think deeper and critically about their responses and the possible ways how it affects others. Even if it breaks their hearts. But oh was I happy to respond to my students from hell!! And honestly I am not afraid of backlash, because I taught them to challenge me, and I promise to challenge them (And oh boi did I!) and that's a tactic and a strategy to acknowledging difference. It is within itself a challenge. Ignoring comments that are problematic and not talking about the "R" word only feeds concepts like abject scripts, Dare Education Be Liberation.

#Thosewhocan
    

Putting a CAP on Feminism

I am a feminist. <--That is such a powerful statement to me. I feel empowered just typing it!

But seriously, being a feminist means a lot to me. Although, I can't just stop there because I am also a teacher. So I must combine these two notions of being a feminist and a teacher and what better way to facilitate these two then by engaging in Communication Activism Pedagogy.

Enck (2014) notes that "from a feminist perspective, the classroom is one of the few spaces where taken-for-granted notions of privilege and power can be productively challenged, and where hopes of social justice and can be voiced." I can only hope to create a classroom environment that serves the purpose of knowledge and social justice for my students.

I want my students in the present and future to be passionate about a social issue and learn how to be an activist and make a difference in the world. As a teacher, I want to challenge my students to think differently than what they have been accustomed to. By no means do I want to force feminism on my students, but I do want to encourage them to be open-minded about a feminist standpoint and how that standpoint can benefit all students, not just women.

Feminists are not solely concerned with the social construction of knowledge, but rather the creation of knowledge. I think it is important for students and teachers to want to create knowledge. After all, that is why we are in this cycle of learning and teaching, right? I argue that instructors and students should seek to find the injustices in their community so they can advocate against them. As instructors, we should all want our students to seek knowledge and truth. I'm not arguing that feminism is the only way to obtain knowledge or truth but it would be a good starting point. If students just so happen to appreciate the feminist perspective and adopt it as their own while being activists for their communities then I encourage that as well. #pedamorgy #stayinyourlain

To my 2020 students

Today was my last day teaching my 2020 recitation class and I can't believe everything is coming to a near end. Although I'm sad that I won't be teaching my 2020 classes, I still have my 1010 class which I'm going to make the most of it. I can't predict how the class is going to end but I hope that all my students took something away from the course and that I was able to make it fun and enjoyable.

So far I've gotten great feedback from my other students as well as some improvements I can do for the future. To be honest, I almost had tears of joy when my students were giving their goodbyes to me. They were telling me their best moments, what they enjoyed most about recitation, and gave me a hug. As they were walking out of the classroom, I had a flashback of my first day when I walked in, all nervous wondering if the were going to take me seriously. Week after week, we were all able to engage and have deep discussions of the content. From laughter, to giving each other advice, to disagreements, and to awkward silences, the classroom dynamic was incredible everyone felt safe and comfortable to disclose about themselves. I've got to learn so much about them during class and in their papers they wrote. I tried my best to be there for them and help as much as I could. I've also got to thank them for the time I wasn't "all there" but they were able to cheer me up.

My students gave me confidence and there wasn't a day that I didn't look forward to teach. One thing I've learned about both of my recitation classes was that you never know what is going to happen, or what is going to come out of their mouth. I hope they finish off the semester great not only in 2020 but in their other classes. For now I'm going to cherish my time in 1010, since our days are numbered. To my 2020 students thank you for letting me be part of your lives even if it was only in the classroom. I wish you all the best!

#WhatAmIDoing #Interpersonal #TeachingAssistant

Put Some Respeck on My Name

I am sporadic, hyper, funny, and caring. These are just a few characteristics of who I am but they are the ones I bring into the classroom. Dannels (2015) argues that teachers should infuse who they are into their teachings. I think I do a thorough job of expressing who I am in my classroom. I joke (appropriately) around with my students, I walk into every classroom with a positive, quirky approach, and I ask my student how they are doing outside of my classroom (because I'm genuinely interested). I am my normal, goofy self in the classroom and I still have the ultimate control over my classroom. For the most part, my students do listen to me and follow my directions but there's always an outlier...

If I am my authentic self in the classroom and I have the ultimate "say-so" in the classroom then why do I always have one student who questions my authority or mocks me? I honestly feel disrespected in my classroom sometimes. Sometimes when I try to be goofy or say something silly, the majority of my classroom laughs but then one student (same one every time) mocks me. He will repeat what I say in a mimicking tone and roll his eyes. At first I didn't think too much of it because I thought that might of been his way of trying to feel included or joking but it continued. The nerve of these kids...

The problem persisted and in turn, I tried to be self-reflexive. Am I doing something to upset this student? Is there something wrong with my personality? What in the world am I doing wrong? My other students did not feed off of his behavior and when he would "strike" they sat in an awkward silence waiting for my response. I ignored it until I just got tired of it.

"Why do you insist on mocking me all the time?" I broke. I had to ask. He was baffled and responded with something along the lines of that he himself did not feel respected. My heart broke. I didn't understand why he felt that way and in fact, I specifically tried to create an environment where my students DID NOT feel that way. Perhaps I joked too much with this particular student. I apologized and told him I never intended for him to feel that way and that I appreciate him telling me what was up. I just wanted to be respected, and he did too.

Dannels (2015) says that "because teaching and learning are human activities, about the only thing you can predict with certainty is unpredictability". The fact that I called out my student was unpredictable and the fact that my student told me he felt disrespected was definitely unpredictable. It was an important lesson for both of us. As teachers, we should all embrace unpredictability as certainty and listen (not just hear) our students.

I just hope next time my student says my name...he puts some Respeck on it. Don't worry, I will for him too.
#pedamorgy #stayinurlain

It Pays to Talk

One of my biggest challenges this semester has been finding ways in which I can engage all of my students in the classroom. In one of my sections, there are about 4 people that help lead discussions and provide their input when I ask the class a question.

• The individual that speaks the most frequent is a non-traditional student who owns 3 businesses. He is a white male. His work is excellent and he tends to make conversation with me the moment I walk into the classroom. 
• My second student, who I have mentioned a few times in the blog posts before, is a young, black female. While she adds to the discussion frequently, she usually gives me extremely honest answers and is not afraid to let me know when she does not care about the material. 
• My third student is a young, white female. She turns in her homework the day it is assigned, has never missed a class period, and gives me incredible nonverbal listening skills. While she is extremely quiet, she will speak up if she knows that I want more student participation.
• My fourth student that helps lead discussion is a young, black female who sits in the very back of the class. She spends most of the class period on her computer, but I have noticed that she will speak up every now and then, especially when discussing about politics. She is very inconsistent with her work, but when she does turn her work in, it is above and beyond what is required.

While I appreciate their enthusiasm, it tends to limit the opportunities for others to speak in the classroom.

Elizabeth Bell and Kim Golombisky discussed a tactic in which teachers can welcome all voices and encourage them to become more active in participating in discussions. "If a few individuals continue to dominate some classes, we may have "pay to talk" days. Distributing three pennies to each student at the beginning of class, we announce, 'To talk in class today you must pay a penny, and you must spend all your pennies. So think about what your comment is worth in the culture of this classroom.' Our most vocal students have to weigh their contributions carefully when limited to three chances to speak."

Although the semester is nearly over, this is an activity I plan to implement in my classroom if the problem arises again. It is so important to as a teacher to make sure they are doing everything they can to help cultivate a classroom in which all voices are heard and appreciated. This teaching philosophy reminds me of a specific drill we use to do during soccer practice. If one of our teammates was scoring most of the goals during practice or handling the ball (even if they were successful) we were required to pass to other people in order to score the goal. This not only created more opportunities for others to participate in scoring a goal, it also helped build stronger trust within the team and allowed individuals to be spotlighted for their achievements.

#Pedagoalie

Pop Culture

Well everyone, 

It appears I inadvertently posted my wrap up post prior to publishing my "official" second blog post for November. I've been texting my partner all day, and when describing the situation of my mistake to him, I sent a gif to help encapsulate my emotions. Not just any gif, but a meme that reinforces Whiteness. I'll post it below. 

Now I know, I know, my role of girlfriend in a private text conversation is very different from my role of teacher in the classroom, as they should be. However, as Freire says, dialogue is a key to creating change and hopefully avoiding hooks' White Supremacist Capitalist Patriarchy. I should not just aim to oppose Whiteness in my classroom, but in my every day life encounters as well. 

Aiming to open our students eyes to the systematic oppression surrounding them and breaking the cycle of abject scripts and Whiteness is absolutely important. Palmer, however, says that our virtues and morals need to align in order to have an effective pedagogy. It is important to not just be an advocate in front of our students, but also in our everyday personal lives. 

Although choosing a gif for a private text conversation is in a different world than choosing pop culture examples in the classroom, in order to help negate Whiteness and WSCP we as pedagogs should aim to implement these tactics in our every day life as well as our pedagogy. 

Trust between students

A couple of weeks ago when I was reading for Consulting I came across a chapter called Teacher as Consultant. This sparked my interest since I didn't think teachers as consultants and I was curious as to how Block was going to approach the subject. 

Block is talking about a high school teacher named Mr. Ward who decided to change his classroom setting by using consulting methods. The concept that caught my attention was consultant building trust. Block talks about the students having trust with one another and how we the teachers act as a third party in a "discovery mode." That we are not the experts but are there to help them build trust. For example, Mr. Ward had a student that was hurt by negative comment that was made about them in class. He then asked for permission to use as a learning experience. This lead Mr. Ward to have a discussion in class where the student express how they felt about the comments without having any disruptions, then he gave the opportunity for everyone else to speak. This allowed for the classroom culture to be re-humanized since they were able to express themselves freely and just listened to one another.

This got me thinking on how it is easy for a student to disengaged in the classroom due to their peers. We are constantly talking about respecting others thoughts and opinions in the classroom, but one thing I have trouble with is knowing when comment is affecting the student or are they joking with each other. Sure there's nonverbal cues but sometimes it can be difficult because I don't want to draw too much attention and making things worse. Moreover, if I'm comfortable enough to hold a conversation about it with the whole class. I guess this would depend on the environment I have in my classroom. I know that if it were to happen in my 1010 I would feel insecure of dealing with the problem just because there are times where the whole class discloses and others where they just stay quiet with a blank face. Although I do agree that we are the third party when it comes to our students and I trust my students with them being sincere and honest with one another, even though I think they don't feel the same with one another. I hope in that in the future I am able to build trust among my students where they feel safe enough to express themselves and have deep discussion in class. Lastly, I believe that it is up to us to do our best to let our students have the opportunity to grow and learn along the way. 

#WhatAmIDoing #FawlessConsulting #Block 

Community

My grandmother passed away November 14th at 9 pm. She was 85 years old. She was not in great shape those last few months. She could hardly eat or speak, and she was in a lot of pain. After endless late nights and early mornings visiting her at the hospital, the doctors finally told my family there was nothing more they could do. We brought her home and put her on hospice. The night she died I went to class and then went straight to her house after. My whole family was there. My mom met me at the door, hugged me, and said, "grandma's gone." I had been with the family all day that day up at her house, so I got to say goodbye to her. Both of my grandfathers died last year. My dad's mother is my only remaining grandparent. The added stress of her decline and death has certainly been a strain this semester. I think it was affecting me a little more than I realized (like crying uncontrollably in class because I was frustrated with my students, oops).

Several pedagogical scholars (Dewey, Palmer, Freire, hooks) discuss communities in the classroom. These scholars typically refer to teachers fostering learning communities within the classroom. However, working communities are also important. I am incredibly fortunate to a part of a great community of wonderful people. These past few weeks my professors and colleagues have been so supportive. From statements of support to putting together a care package, all of you have helped me get through this situation. Not just in these past few weeks, but through this entire difficult and stressful process. 

Thank you all for everything,

Jayme

All Good Things Must Come To An End - Official Wrap Up Post

Then end of November is near, meaning so is the end of the semester. Final assignments in graduate classes are due, grades need to be finalized, and holiday vibes are in full swing.

WARNING: LONG (hopefully useful) POST AHEAD

I have loved getting to read everyone's blog posts and responses throughout the semester. The diverse perspective you all bring to the table, in addition to the readings and Karen's role in class, I can honestly say have created been an eye-opening and inspiring experience in pedagogy for me. As the semester comes to a close, I'd like to touch on a few tactics I plan to implement (or continue implementing) in my pedagogy endeavors, as learned throughout this semester, as well as give some reassuring closing remarks.

Things I plan to implement (or continue implementing):

1. Having students, in some way, submit pop culture examples relevant to course materials (as suggested by McCauliff & Denker). 
2. Let my authenticity flow into the classroom more (Palmer).
3. Stay consistent (Dannels)!
4. Make detailed To-Do lists.

My goal with #1 on the implementation list is to avoid what hooks calls the White Supremacist Capitalist Patriarchy - I want to avoid "whitewashing" my classroom as much as possible, and create a diverse learning experience with relevant examples for all of my students. I hope to gain a lot from implementing this tactic in my classroom - after all, I want to learn WITH my students. This will also be the push I need to really start facilitating more class discussions favored around interests of the students, thus avoiding and encouraging everything AGAINST Freire's Banking Model. 

Goal #2 is based on Palmer's idea of heartwork, and the idea that identity & integrity + re-memberment = authenticity. My first semester teaching was the semester I most heavily tried to put on a "teacher persona". Realizing quickly that not only is it uncomfortable for me, but not benefiting my students, I began working on feeling confident enough to let the real Rudi shine in the classes I teach. Perhaps it was my Impostor Syndrome causing me to feel I needed the persona to seem credible or just a general case of the nerves, I worked hard this second semester to more closely pinpoint my identity and integrity, engaged in re-memberment, and will continue to reach full authenticity in my classrooms for ultimate teacher/student success.

Goal #3 is based on a piece of advice given to teachers in the Dannels text during orientation and Week 1 in our pedagogy course - BE CONSISTENT. I had a bit of a problem staying consistent with my students my first semester of teaching: when grades would be posted, slides available on BlackBoard, remembering questions students asked, etc. When matters of inconsistency occurred, it was a burden for both my students and myself. My second semester teaching I really focused on being consistent for my students because I recognized consistency as an area I needed improvement in. My second semester I set tasks for myself to ensure I stay consistent, and I plan to continue to utilize and build on these tasks, such as always posting my lecture slides the Sunday before I teach and enabling the slides to not be visible to students until 12pm the day of class. In addition, I also have an app that links to my laptop, Google Home, and cell phone to make lists of questions or concerns to make sure I remember what needs to be done. 

Finally, goal #4, though not relevant to the materials we've covered thus far in the course, is one I feel is important to my success personally. I realized, through many years of trial and error, I am most productive when I make a weekly to-do list and an extensive daily to-do list. For these lists to work for me, I have to be very specific and list out every tiny task to keep me feeling accomplished, and thus keeping me motivated. For example, instead of writing "grade journal 9 - COMM 2140", I must separate the task by sections: "grade journal 9 - COMM 2140.202...grade journal 9 - COMM 2140.203".

Those of you who have made it this far and are still reading, thank you. I promise I am almost done typing an novel for this last blog post, but I would first like to leave some closing remarks.

First and foremost, remember becoming a great pedagogical figure is a process. We are all constantly learning and improving ourselves and our methods. As Emily says, #KeepOnKeepinOn and make goals to achieve, following Chelsea's message of being a #pedaGOALIE. Keep working to #reengage students and adjusting your pedagogy to the needs of your students, without allowing brain-dead pedagogy in the classroom. #ThoseWhoCan SHOULD continue working towards new pedagogical goals, and more importantly...

#dontpanic

The End Has Come - WRAP UP POST

Raise your hand if you didn't realize the end of the semester is right around the corner. Thanksgiving is next week and in 2 weeks it will be December. YAY! Christmas! 🎅🎄

So, we are so close to finishing our 1st semester (for some 2nd) of Grad school. We did it, y'all! AND we did it while teaching 90 students. Ah! It feels great doesn't it? It does, except for the part when you add in those 90 students freaking out about final projects and final grades #DebbieDowner. Read your syllabus you mofos! ALL the info is there! My gosh. It's like I'm working at a daycare again. It is not hard people, I have given you all the info you need and repeated myself billions of times. Don't get me wrong, I have LOVED teaching MOST of these kids but damn.

Anyway, that was probably my last little rant. This semester has definitely been a learning experience. I have had to learn how to manage my time a little better, how to take time for myself, how to be a bit more patient, and how even when things get hectic, there is always a light at the end of the tunnel.

Throughout the semester we have learned about several pedagogical theories and how to apply them. There are so many and I think that each and everyone is useful in some way. We may not agree with some of them but even then, we can use the ones we don't like and learn from them as a reminder of what not to do. Honestly, I think that my favorite is pedagogy of the oppressed. I never really thought about myself as being oppressed scholastically or oppressed in a learning environment, in general. Being a minority and a woman, I will always know that I am oppressed in some sort of way #HoustonWeHaveAProblem. After this course, I know that even the smallest thing can help me to free myself from those who are my oppressors. I also learned that not only can I work towards my own personal freedom, but also that I can learn with others while simultaneously trying to help them realize their oppression. In society, we must all work together to free ourselves from the mythical norm. We can't continue living in the cycle of oppression. I think that we, as instructors can achieve this goal.We need to move forward, not backward if we want to be free.

As instructors, we have the duty and the ability to stop the vicious cycle of oppression. How can we do this? By taking everything we have learned not only in this course but also through our environments, and then passing on this knowledge to our students. The oppression cycle only keeps going if people like us allow it to continue. I know that us being here, in this graduate program, gives us the necessary tools to make a change. We all have a little bit of magic inside of us. It is time to take some of that magic and use it to transform the world. It starts with one. 

With this I leave you, use your powers (Knowledge is power) for the good of humanity.
Who doesn't want world peace?
I leave you with some wise nonverbals from none other than one of my faves...Ross Gellar.

Just kidding, I love you all! Mari Out💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚 (One heart for each of you)
-M.A.

Ignorance is blis...I guess

So as most of you guys, I did the privilege walk this week. What can I say? This experience was really eye opening. I started off the week by showing my students 2 small clips of the movie crash (one of my all-time faves). I can't even begin to explain how shocked I was when only 3 of my students knew about this movie. *Sighs* #Oldpeopleproblems. Anyway, we had a small discussion after the clips; I am sad to say that SOME students mentioned that they didn't believe racism was still a thing. Are you serious? I mean, are you living under a rock? It is all around us. You are oppressed & you don't even know it. *Woosah*

I suppose the fact that they don't know they're oppressed should allow me to cut them some slack. Not much, but some. After all, they live in a society that implements the abject script method into pretty much everything in the media, politics, etc. It is not their fault that they have been conditioned to think a certain way due to their environment. I just wish that they cared enough to learn why it is important to change their way of thinking, or at least to keep an open-mind. I thought these specific students' minds would change a bit after the privilege walk and I don't know if it was because it was early or not, but the activity didn't seem to phase them #HoustonWeHaveAProblem. At least it's just a few of them.

I wish there was more that I could do in order to educate them, sadly, after 3 weeks, they're leaving the nest. My poor babies, alone in this world to figure shit out on their own. It is CRITICAL that they change their way of thinking 😁, or else this world is going to eat them alive #DebbieDowner. 

Oh well. I tried. I really did. I feel like throughout this course, I have done my part to inject bits and pieces of De La Mare's Critical Communication Pedagogy teaching methods in order to put thoughts into my students' heads. Thoughts about changing their way of thinking, keeping an open mind, being accepting of others, and listening to what people have to say. I did the Service-learning project (which allowed them to gain a meaningful experience by helping those in need), we did a lot of audience analysis before the projects began in order to get them better acquainted with each other as well as their organization, they are doing their "final speech" in forms of presenting the outcome of their semester-long service learning activity while simultaneously educating the audience, and finally, we will conduct the debriefing portion with mini-discussions after each presentation and also through their peer evals and individual/group documentation. I think we all have done a lot in order to help our students become less oppressed but there is only so much we can do. The best we can hope for is that this class helps our students out in at least a small portion of their understanding of the world. After all, change is incremental, it won't happen in just one semester. It will take some time. In some, more than others but at least we have the satisfaction in knowing we did our best.

-M.A.

Goals Are Not Deserved, Goals Are Made

Coaching sports at a smaller university can be tricky for three reasons:

1) You will have some athletes there, sometimes from other teams, playing for the scholarship only.

2) Many of these athletes are true freshman, meaning you get to be the coach they have right out of high school.

3) Regardless if they enjoy your coaching or not, many of them will not put in the work if they don’t have to.

Teaching an intro course can be tricky for three reasons:

1) You will have some students there, typically not from that major, taking the course to “get it out of the way”.

2) Many of these students are true freshman, meaning you get to be the teacher they have right of high school.

3) Regardless if they enjoy the class or not, many of them will not put in the work if they don’t have to.

See what I did there?

Lately, I’ve been noticing some resistance to learning more material. Since REVEL is out of the picture (thank the Lord), there really is not pressure put on our 1010 students to learn new material. They could use this time to prepare for the test, but why would they do that when they can cram the night before? It’s okay, we’ve all been there.

One of my sections really values learning material, but they don’t read. Therefore, the activities are not as plentiful or rewarding for them. So, before the beginning of my lecture this week, I told them
how important it is they read and listed all the reasons why. I continued to get blank stares so I blatantly asked them why most of them aren’t reading in which one of my students replied, “Chelsea, with all due respect, we all have better things to do from other classes that actually have points associated with them.” (As Kevin Howard would say, “The blatant disrespect!”) So, I told the class I understood, encouraged them to read for our next class period, and moved on.

I could not stop thinking about this conversation, so I did something crazy.

In my classes, I rely heavily on discussion with a liiiiittle bit of lecture. I honestly try to make activities short so we can have more time to talk about them. This same section seems to not really enjoy that I don’t just lecture them. So, I took some of Kahl’s thoughts and taught my class a little bit about why I do things the way that I do.

I introduced them to the Banking Model of Education, lectured about Paulo Freire, and finished with explaining how I respect them SO much that I don’t want to use the hegemonic system in my classroom (believing they know nothing, that I know everything and do all the thinking, that I am forcing my thoughts onto them). This was a great transition into our activity regarding hegemony for Language, Power, and Culture week.

I saw an intense mood shift in the room once I was finished with the short lecture. My typically disengaged class was all-of-a-sudden perked up out of their seats and some were even nodding and smiling. One student even said, “Thank you for not thinking we’re stupid.” We finished class after our Privilege Walk activity (that they all enthusiastically participated in) and even though I accidentally went over by 3 minutes, no one stopped me or started packing up their stuff.

When you’re playing sports, there are times where you’re going to question what your coach is doing. They may make you run laps all practice and you may even become frustrated that there is no immediate reward. It is not until the end of the season that you realize all of those laps you ran helped you become a better athlete, a better player, and a better person. The same philosophy can be used with teaching, but may be times in the semester where you will need to explain to your students the method to their madness to avoid leaving them in the dark, build trust, and push them to achieve the goals.

#Pedagoalie

It's Hard to Hold A Candle In The Cold November Rain

WARNING: Venting Post Ahead

Like Kevin, I question whomever titled October as "Hell Month" for us graduate TA's because for me, November takes the cake as the most hectic. With 1010 papers to grade, 2140 debates to create and present, plus my own graduate student responsibilities... I. AM. DROWNING. In all honesty, I hit a point on Thursday of last week where my motivation depleted drastically and immediately. Seriously all of it gone - *poof*. 

 

I feel like my motivation is a candle that I am diligently trying to keep lit in the cold November rain, with the November rain being all my responsibilities. Like the Guns N' Roses song goes: "You're not the only one". I know most of you resonate with my feelings of being overwhelmed and stressed out - so much so, that I feel we have forgotten what my hashtag (#dontpanic) is about. 

Panicking about completing upcoming assignment? About keeping up with grading? About why your students appear brain-dead? About talking through abject scripts? About better infiltrating pop culture into the classroom? I hate to give the answer that always makes people feeling this way upset, but...: #DONTPANIC. Although we all feel like we are sitting in a room on fire... 

 

...that doesn't have to serve as a disadvantage for us all! We are all in the same boat, and although we cannot expect those around us to "carry" us, we can use one another to work smarter - not harder. Instead of panicking about how to grade that assignment, what pop culture reference to use, or switching up your pedagogical technique, reach out to a co-worker to talk through whatever you're panicking. Instead of exerting all of our energy into panicking, perhaps we should be using it into crafting the most successful experience out students can get. 

As the semester comes to a close, we as pedagogy members need to re-direct our panics and instead try to put that energy into a hopefully beneficial outcome for our students. We should avoid wasting time worrying, panicking, and pondering these worries and instead use that time to better set our students up for success. We have to follow Emily and my's advice - #keeponkeepinon and #dontpanic.

Critical Pedagogy, not Critical Pedagogy

Student: *raises hand

Me: "Yes student?"

Student: "Something racists, sexist, ablest, homophobic, or otherwise problematic"

Me: "No that is wrong. You are stupid for thinking that. Moving on"

The above example is not critical pedagogy. The above example is just critical. My students would not learn if I only told them they were wrong. As an instructor, I need to redirect my students in a way they can hear, and then give them solid evidence as to why their views are problematic. I also need to keep in mind they most likely grew up with these ideal and they may be confronting these issues for the first time.

            Fassett and Warren also comment critical pedagogy is more than simply criticism. They comment, "we went after other scholars as though we were killing snakes… a more finely worded equivalent of 'you know what's wrong with you?' It's much easier to deconstruct than to build, to criticize without a hopeful and generous sense of possibility" (p. 35). Fassett and Warren express the belief that non-constructive critiques result from not listening.

            As instructors, our duty is to listen to our students, not shut them down. We need to encourage and help our students grow in their understanding. To create understanding with not for them. Fassett and Warrant comment, "if we displace collaboration in favor of 'being right' or showing other how they are irretrievably wrong, we encourage violence" (p. 36). To only criticize is not critical pedagogy. Critical pedagogy is reflexive, based in logic and understanding, and it produces hope. We must first seek to understanding our students and then seek to help them grow.

#reengage 

I need to vent!

Okay... (inhales & and exhales)
Ready? (I hope so!)
Get set. (Brace yourselves)
RANT!

Everything is due!! Whoever said that October is 'Hell Month' needs to reevaluate. Papers on papers! Don't forget that students' papers are due as well, on the 12th. My reaction paper is going to look something like ...................... (This). I am running out of funds to print papers for readings, assignments, reviews, and evaluations. While scratching my beard this morning a gray hair fell on my paper while taking notes and conducting thoughts to write on my final paper. Why do I wake up at six A.M. oh yeah because I need to chase this paper. What will I do after Grad school? I don't know. Hopefully make paper. speaking of paper, rent is due. I don't think I have enough paper. I'm all out of paper plates and I am too busy to stop and wash dishes. If I seriously have to read another paper I think I'll jump off a sidewalk. Oh no!!! I forgot how to make a paper airplane (crumbles up the feeble attempt of the airplane and gets prepared to throw it in Jaime's trash can). Actually, I think I'll just crumble up 5 pieces of paper, pretend like it's basketball, and shot them into Jaime's trash can to relieve myself from some of the stress. (crumbles paper one) Let it rain! (crumbles paper two) Drop that ass! (crumbles paper three) Splash! (crumbles paper three) Expecto Patronum! (crumbles paper four) Expelliarmus! (crumbles paper five) Kobe!! Fuck! I should have said Kawhi, his shooting percentage looks better on paper. My Jaimie would be proud, I made all five papers! Why is her recycling bin always filled with papers?

This week I was observed. The lecture was over the performance chapter. I think that this chapter does a good job condensing performance, however, the activities focus on story telling. I go a bit further and hop on my soapbox and passionately rant about how performance is fluid; the intersection of advocacy, ethics, vulnerability, and intercultural texts; performance, like literature, does something in the world; a device in which we use to come to knowing and convey meaning; and restored behavior; constructs and shapes reality. After class, my colleague condemned me for speaking to my class in such vocabulary and did not like that I named drop theorists grad students learn about. My colleague expressed that everyone does not know this vocabulary and although I am passionate, undergrads are "probably not going to get it like you and I, so stay away from that". I respectfully and whole heartily disagree!

I hate observations for this exact reason. Observations are so one sided and unfair. Observations make me question if my teaching practices are good, but based on what? One perspective. That one person comes into the classroom one time out of the entire semester and critiques the way you run your classroom and vocabulary you use with them. I saw this observation as nothing but a compare and contrast to what my colleague does in their class.

Since when do we limit our students? Why are assuming that students are not capable of obtaining higher knowledge? Do you think undergrads are stupid? Did it ever occur that there has been other days we have talked about important theorists in my class that contribute to our field beyond revel? If knowledge is power I am going to go above and beyond to not only do my job but I want to co-create knowledge. I do not address my students as undergrads, they are young people that are placed in a position to LEARN! Just like Graduate students. So, no, I don't mind sharing WITH them what I learn in grad classes. They are interested and engaged, why restrict them to what is only on revel and blackboard? I do not share everything with them, however, when they do ask me what I am learning I share it with them and together we connect course concepts. Students should not be looked down upon because you think you know a lot more than they do. That's conventional and hegemonic.I hold my students at a higher level, something that my colleague would have known if attended more than one day. I have a more productive question: When are we going stop acting like our students don't have brain capacity and When are we going to start treating them like abled learners? If the word can't implies limit then I can continue to believe that my students are capable of learning beyond limits. If I want to become a great teacher I not only have to understand that I need to push myself beyond doing my job as teacher but, I must push my students beyond their jobs of  learning out of a text book.

#Thosewhocan #Donewithranting #Jaymehatesme

If You're Going Through Hell, Keep Going

During high school, I went through the most difficult time in my life. From my sophomore year, up until my graduation, I seriously hated everything and everyone. I was always grateful for my friends being there for me during this time, but what really sticks out to me are the relationships I formed with some of my teachers. I really valued these relationships because these teachers didn’t have to do what they did for me. They continuously went out of their way to make sure I was doing okay and offer their guidance. Had it not been for these relationships, I'm not sure I would have been able to make it through as productively.

via GIPHY

In the classroom, there are two different roles being played. There is one teacher, and many students. Of course, the people playing these roles also play others, but they aren’t necessarily present in the classroom. Teachers don’t need to know their students in other roles that they play, simply because it's not in their job description. However, the ones that beg to differ are the ones that really make a difference.

One of the reasons in which I was most excited to teach was because I wanted to be able to offer that same type of guidance to others that I had received in the past. People are always going through something, and sometimes they just need someone to listen to them. I think that if students want to be able to be open with their teachers, they should. I have had a few of my students confide in my about very personal situations, and I am grateful that they trust me enough to do so. It helps me understand them in their roles outside of being student, which makes me feel like I am doing my job.

Parker Palmer says that a good teacher is authentic and lets their identity come through in the classroom. That's exactly what I'm trying to do. I want to be that teacher that my kids can open up to, not just throw a bunch of excuses and short answers at. I’ve learned that students going through rough patches will bounce back stronger if they are open with their teachers, and they receive openness in return. I am glad I had the guidance I did in high school and that I was able to keep going. I am especially glad that I now can and do the same for my students should they find themselves in similar situations so that they too can keep going.

#keeponkeepinon

Page 69

One of the reasons I love studying communication is because we are always encouraged to address the difficult questions and dig a little deeper. I believe that in a lot of classrooms, no matter the subject, if a sensitive topic comes up, most instructors would avoid it and direct discussion back to subject matter. This being said, I also believe that these questions are less likely to come up in subjects such as math or science where classes are focused on content that is based on facts and numerical data. This might just be my personal opinion, but how boring would learning be if we never went below the surface?

Like every other subject, communication has its basics and fundamentals. People work the same way. People have their surface level selves in which you would base initial perceptions off of. However, we all know there's more to people than what we see on the surface. Communication studies encourages learners to always ask "why?" and talk about the sensitive topics.

I want my students to be able to ask difficult questions because I don't think they have a lot of other opportunities to do so, at least at school. However, to be able to address these topics in a productive way, that requires a lot of maturity and respect in the classroom. Well, yesterday I told my students to open to page 69 in their books and I quickly learned that we might not be there yet.

via GIPHY

It's pretty simple actually. I think there are a lot of kids who would rather not risk looking stupid than dig a little deeper and uncover some real knowledge. So how can we, as educators, fix this problem? I think this is the not so simple part. We can't force our students to dig deeper and ask difficult questions. For the most part, we are leading classrooms filled with first year students who have never met each other before this class and most likely have no relationship outside of the classroom. However,I think that having built a solid foundation in the classroom and having established some good relationships, we can pave the way for discussion about sensitive topics. If we ourselves go beyond the content matter and ask questions that require a little more thinking and reflection, and ones that kids might be afraid to answer, they will eventually learn the benefits.

I love talking about the tough stuff. My only hope is that my students reciprocate those feelings so that we can have meaningful discussion that really breaks the surface level and forces everyone to dig a little deeper. My philosophy for this particular concept would be something along the lines of, "grow up, get over yourself, and don't be afraid to ask the difficult questions... knowledge and discovery are cool, SO DIG PEOPLE, DIG!" And, as always... #keeponkeepinon

Hey Palmer, Am I Caring Too Much?

Happy November everyone! As many of you know (or anyone that reads my blog posts), my first semester as a graduate student and teacher has been pretty chaotic. Although I would love to pound away on my keyboard about all the frustrations caused by my students, I want to focus on something that I found not only relevant to this blog, but relevant to my own life...and maybe yours.

All semester, I have had trouble with one of my sections being disengaged, every friggin’ day. I have tried every pedagogical tactic Dr. Karen Anderson-Lain has taught us (pair and share, small group work, cold-calling, warm-calling, strictly lecturing them, threatening their grades, offering moral support, activities out the wazoo, ending class early if they participated...the list goes on). However, nothing has worked. Everyday after I teach that specific section, I am exhausted and completely overworked from exerting so much love into 30 people that wouldn’t reciprocate anything back.

I had a fellow TA come and sit in on my class just for fun and to help me assess what was going on with my classroom. Her class that she normally teaches was cancelled so we thought it would be a cool opportunity to compare and contrast our teaching styles. Long story short, our fellow TA was appalled by the behavior my students. In fact, she said their behavior was horrible. They were silent, completely “zombied-out”, and not engaged whatsoever. She assured me it was undeniable that my students liked and respected me, they had no interest in anything I was trying to teach them. Nonetheless, I was still deeply offended and hurt. More so, I was salty as heck that I cared this much about my students.

Do y’all remember during orientation week when we took the read the Top 5 Strengths Finder by Don Clifton and took the extensive quiz that told us what our 5 strengths were? To refresh your memory, there are 4 possible domain strengths you can get which include executing, influencing, relationship building, and strategic thinking. Normally, people end up with a few or even a couple different domain strengths. Well, I vividly remember getting the results and actually laughing at how accurate they were:

1. Positivity
2. Woo (Winning Others Over)
3. Adaptability
4. Empathy
5. Communication

All 5, are relationship building strengths. All 5 y’all. Yikes. No wonder I’ve been crying over my students’ acceptance all semester long. However, I couldn’t help but to be reminded of a quote I highlighted in our dear ol’ bell hook’s text. She says,  “Profound commitment to engaged pedagogy is taxing to the spirit.” This statement made me realize that caring for your students is a part of teaching and sometimes it’s going to hurt. Although I may want to retreat from caring for my students because it’s less painful than letting them pull at the strings of my heart, it is not natural for me and I should not force myself to act anything but my authentic self..right, Palmer?

Passion is what drives us to do great things in life. In sports, passion is the fuel in which ignites players to unite, overcome their fears, and achieve their goals. Teaching with care for our students is an aspect of education that we should view as a top priority in order for our students to achieve their dreams...even if we have to smother them with love at times.

#Pedagoalie