Just Make It Out Alive...

Happy Fall, beautiful people!

We're kicking off week 5 of the fall semester as we speak. It's currently the end of September, which means all the fun fall-time vibes are taking over my world (it's my favorite season). I've already made a Pumpkin Pie Swirl Cheesecake and purchased my puppy four fall time sweaters/shirt... and her Halloween costume. October is my favorite month of the year. I love the festivities and the weather and the food. October in graduate school is apparent known as a "Hell Month" - it's been translated to me as being the hardest month of the semester due to both grad student and teaching responsibilities.

Bummer.


For today's blog post, I'm going to address the importance of your mental health and confidence in the classroom. Thinking about the upcoming chaos of October and the middle of the semester approaching, I can't help but reflect on my mental state of mind last semester, and how it would feel having to go through it a second time, only this second time it would be during my FAVORITE PART OF THE YEAR. I feel it's important to encourage graduate students and educators alike to take occasional break from work, work, work and to care for your mental health. I'm also going to address confidence in the classroom because for me personally, my mental health almost always impacts my confidence.

Last semester, my first semester in both graduate school and as a teaching assistant, I felt panicked and anxious just about all of the time. Seriously. Any time I had to lecture, grade assignments, whether or not my feedback was sufficient, when I was asked a question I was not 100% confident in...

You get the drift.

My first semester of being a graduate teaching assistant wasn't pretty. I felt pressured to spend all of my time in my schoolwork and in materials for the classes I was teaching. I refused to go out and socialize with my friends, family, and peers. Seriously. I N-E-V-E-R left my house. I was always anticipating things I hadn't done yet that needed to get done, no matter how far in the future they really were.

My mental health was in turmoil and I was suffering from a bad case of Impostor Syndrome causing a lot of anxieties in the classroom. I constantly felt panicked by responsibilities, unprepared for the amount of authority I was given, and my confidence in myself was tragically low. I felt a new form of relief when I finished my first semester - I still remember my heart sinking when I submitted my final grades.

It's finally over. You made it out alive. It's done.

After many talks with my good friend Jayme, who is currently embarking on her first semester of being a graduate teaching assistant (Go Jayme!), I was able to decide exactly what I want this first blog post to cover while still addressing the theme #dontpanic. I wanted to make my blog post relevant for those who may be struggling in their first semester, or any semester really, of their teaching career. 

First and foremost, take care of your mental health.



Seriously folks, your mental health is important for your students' success and your success, both inside the classroom and out. I know the pressure, responsibility, and stress of being an educator can be A LOT to adjust to. #dontpanic if you have to put off writing that response paper another 2 hours to meditate. You and your brain deserve a break.

I've been where you are, learn from my mistakes. I'm told the first semester is the hardest. As the full swing of the semester begins, I can think of nothing more important than self-care.

Tips from Rudi:

• Meditate (your brain is a muscle, too! give it a break!) 
• Try to get as much sleep as you can
• DRINK WATER
• #dontpanic if you go have fun for a few hours on Friday but still haven't finished that assignment due on Monday. Don't be afraid to say yes to the occasional social outing to take a mental break. 
• Try to find a few friends in your department to do activities with. It makes me feel a lot more comfortable knowing my coworkers are taking a break, too. 
• Do what you need to to take care of yourself - especially if it means asking for help 

I promise once you complete the semester, you will feel so proud of yourself. However, if you need help, including professional help, please reach out. Your well-being matters. 

Second, be confident in the classroom. 

One source of panic I experienced last semester was fearing my students could tell I wasn't confident and didn't feel qualified to have the quality of their education in my hands. That, and my wardrobe directly mirrored my confidence. I immediately dressed super relaxed because I thought it would make me look more comfortable in front of the class. Big mistake. I remembered back in my undergraduate years, I used to say "dress well, do well", and decided to go for it this second semester. I traded in last semester's black leggings and a sweater for clothes that made me feel confident and empowered. I dress like I accept and respect the authority given to me, which is actually a point Deanna P. Dannels makes in her book Eight Essential Questions Teachers Ask.

Of course there is more to credibility than just outward appearance, but we will cover that at a later date. For now if you haven't already, you should give Dannels' book a read! Anyway, as I said earlier, my mental health will play into my confidence. Unfortunately, that confidence can impact your students. Why should they have confidence in my abilities if I don't even have confidence in my abilities? For me, faking-it-till-I-make-it is how I switch to a persona that is confident. 

For me, this includes: 

• Actually brushing my hair
• Wearing make up (to each their own, make up just makes me feel more confident)
• Throw on an outfit that makes you feel confident. This will radiate in your classroom.
• Brushing over the course materials with a coworker
• Double checking I have all class materials

Dannels says to not panic when the unexpected happens. As it gets deeper into the semester, #dontpanic if you need to take a mental health break or if you completely blank on the definition of a key term in front of your students. Remember to take care of yourself and to fake-it-till-you-make-it by trying to act confidently. Reach out to a friend, be a friend, and kick major pedagological butt.

#dontpanic