hooking up with my educational philosphy

In my classroom, I tend to focus on relationship building with my students and I believe I've embodied the philosophies of both Friere and bell hooks. Recently, I had a encounter in one of my classes that troubled me. In class we were talking about diversity in group communication. I took this opportunity to have a gritty and raw conversation about "having a seat at the table." Many of my students expressed they didn't know what the term referred to, so I took the time to explain it. I then began a scenario with 12 straight white men sitting at the table. I began to probe my class to discuss the diversity and inclusion issue with this situation. We all agreed that "diversity in thought" is important, and yes, straight white men will all have varying thoughts, strategies and ideas BUT its still not allowing for multiple perspectives. I had a white male student who became visibly agitated with my commentary as I begin to incorporate other groups of people. When I inquired what would happen when two white women were invited to have a seat at the table, he physically shouted with a red face "WELL THEY'RE STILL WHITE SO NOT GOOD ENOUGH!" His sarcasm and apparent anger shifted the entire classroom dynamic and students who were engaged in the conversation, shut down. Quite honestly, I even was shut down. I completed the example but the entire classroom climate shattered and I was disappointed.  I had no idea what to say. As a black woman I begin questioning my image with my students. How was I being viewed? Am I the black teacher that rocks her afro and yells out "Black Lives Matter!" with a fist in the air to them? Do I have an agenda? Am I using reverse racism? (I have several students who believe this is a thing) I became extremely self-conscious about the materials that I would have to cover in class. After getting great advice from Karen and then reading bell hooks, I began to feel better about covering power, culture and all the uncomfortable topics that may put my students with privilege "in their feelings." #TheReal #InMyFeelings

Although, I had one student who was visibly upset, I still had 20+ students who were engaged and intrigued in the conversation. The learning environment had trans-formative qualities, and because I shut down as the instructor, I halted the productive learning environment. My fear stopped me. I mean who cares if my students think I'm a black activist? I mean, I am, so why am I concerned about what they think? Being my authentic self in the classroom is key for me. I'm learning that now.

After nine weeks of pedagogy, I finally believe I've met my soul-sister in theory, bell hooks. bell hooks says that trans-formative learning happens when critical thinking and literacy are combined. As we've talked about in orientation and class, we can't teach students to think critically but we can create a stimulating learning environment with engaged pedagogy. I'm ready for the next classroom encounter, I will not shut down and will take that opportunity to participate in creating a transformative learning environment.  #BerryBlues #TheReal